Redefining What 'Healthy' Means For Reflectors

Your Human Design is a blueprint for helping you live in alignment. I'm pretty sure we've all heard that before. But what has me on edge these days is the implication that what's healthy for one person is healthy for all. This is especially problematic when you think about how different each Human Design type is with energy, aura, and undefined centres being a major part of what makes Reflectors the unique 1%.

Here are a few areas that might be considered part of a healthy life for other types but don't exactly apply to Reflectors.

Finding Balance In Your Life

The idea of striving for "balance" in my life has never made sense. It seemed crazy to devote equal time and attention to priorities across all areas of life, yet everywhere I turned people were encouraging me to find a more balanced approach in what I was doing. Why would I dedicate the same amount of energy to something I don't care about as something I'm deeply interested in?

When Human Design came into my life, though, it made total sense why I couldn't get on board with this concept.

Balance implies a level of consistency, equality, and fairness. And for Reflectors, the only type who are meant to be completely different beings each day, there really is no such thing when it comes to how we spend our energy. One way to think of it is to imagine that each effort costs a certain amount of energy. For other types the energy cost is pretty equal regardless of what the activity is but for Reflectors, that equality goes out the window.

Spending four hours diving into a new hobby or interest might feel easier and lighter than a five minute conversation with a difficult family member. So, why would you ever listen to someone who says you should spend the same time on both of these things? I've been on the receiving end of this advice from people who, kind-hearted as they are, cannot possibly understand the nuances of how Reflectors experience life. They tell me I'm being antisocial or don't put myself out there enough because from an outside perspective, I don't spend equal time in my relationships and on my learning, for example. What they fail to see is that Reflectors sense things in others so deeply that we can build friendships in minutes if it's the right connection. Doing things the 'traditional' way only drags out our interactions when we already know that person isn't a good fit. Maybe this explains why small talk is the bane of a Reflector's existence! We are spending precious energy on relationships that will never allow us to go as deep as we need to for it to feel aligned.

Show Up Consistently
If you've ever had a traditional job you know there are expectations to show up each day and do your work in a consistent (highly productive) way. You might also hear this about things like getting into a fitness routine, setting aside money for savings, waking up at the same time each day, and building habits in general.

In theory consistency is super helpful. Taking action in the same way each time you do it probably saves a lot of brain power because it becomes second nature. I've definitely found this to be true when I used to wake up at 5am each day so I could be at the gym by 6am. But, and this is a big BUT…just because you can do something consistently doesn't mean it's healthy for you. Take my wake up and gym schedule for example. I was forcing myself to do intense physical activity at a time of day when my energy was at its absolute lowest. Sure, I made it work but I was always exhausted and burned out.

For a Reflector, consistency isn't about taking the "same action". It doesn't mean pushing to have the exact daily routine we had the day before, because that goes against everything we're designed to be! Instead, consistency is more like "same intention". So rather than sticking to a rigid schedule, you can focus more on the intention or reason behind the action, to get the same (or better) result. My fitness routine these days sometimes includes getting up early to go to the gym, sometimes includes riding the Peloton bike around lunch time, and often includes walking around outside in nature. Being consistent with my intention to lead a healthy physical lifestyle is way more aligned to my Reflector self than sticking to some rigid schedule.

Follow the Rules
One of the biggest challenges I came up against when deciding to support other Reflectors in this blog and business, was how to do it without laying down rules. Like, as a Reflector, thou shalt always go to bed before you're tired. Strict rules of engagement for Reflectors fly in the face of our design, so anytime I'm sharing tips or tactics I try to lay them out in ways you can totally customize.

When you're the only Human Design type that changes not only daily but multiple times each day, rules become very difficult to embrace. I'm not talking about legal rules here, of course. This is a conversation about what 'healthy' looks like for you.

I think this really comes down to trusting yourself instead of letting others tell you what's going to work for you. Logically if something works for the majority of people, like working a traditional 9-5 job, it makes sense that we should give it a try. But if you try it out and find that you're miserable, stressed, drained, or just not feeling at your best, then it's probably a rule or accepted practice that you need to say no to.

Human Design can seem like a really complicated system if you look at all the little pieces that come together to form your chart. But it doesn't have to be. Knowing your type, strategy, and authority gives you enough information to see how you are meant to operate. And for Reflectors, being the 1% who are designed entirely differently than the other 99%, it should come as no surprise that we're here to chart our own paths based on what we know to be true for ourselves.